The award for...

...Most Revolting Simile of the Year goes to Gerard Baker of the Times:

'Watching them embrace Mr Giuliani is like watching survivors from a shipwreck clinging to a giant turd in the water. It’s no one’s first choice of support from the briny waves but if you hold your nose it’s still better than any of the alternatives.'

But why would there be a giant turd in the water? Do whales produce giant turds? Do they float? Tell me more, Mr Baker.